it's all good
April 11, 2015
i often get asked "how's life?"
should i answer with the rawness? or just with what i always say ... it's all good.
should i/we throw the negative reality at you ? do you REALLY want to feel it every time?
the tears filled of shame from waking up to diarrhea all splattered in my boxers and not being able to do a damn thing about it, but wait, to be wiped down?
the frustration of not being able to communicate what i want/ need to my caregivers or family?
the fact that how people around feel or are fatigued that day, DIRECTLY affects my day?
and again, not being able to do a damn thing about it?
the heart ripping rage inside from not getting my opinions heard or from feeling so damn helpless in this world
or maybe the sorrows of imagining "what could have been"?
or the loneliness of watching everybody do things i envy... so much... ?
... naaahh... it's all good... i'll keep it in, to keep you close ...